Perez

So anybody who knows me, knows that I am completely addicted to celebrity blogger Perez Hilton. I usually start my mornings off with him (he is like my cup of coffee) and check in with him periodically through out the day. He is like a friend that I have never met or communicated with before. I know his likes and dislikes, his political views, sexual orientation, current crushes, etc. I know when he is traveling, when he is throwing a party, and after the party, who attended. I love the way he writes, his humor, and his special drawings. Like any friend, we have some tastes that are similar and some that are completely different. For instance, I mirror his feelings for Miley Cyrus. He can not stand her. I in turn, can not stand her. This can sometimes cause conflicting emotions in the Blackwood house seeing as I have a 5 year old little girl the completely idolizes her. For those who think that I am being a little harsh, let me point out some things about Ms. Cyrus:
1. She dresses like a slut. Now some may argue that most 15 year old girls dress a little slutty, but here is the difference. She is dressing for "her fans" which happen to be in the 5-9 age group. Having my daughter want to wear short dresses with knee high boots grinding on the table trying to copy her performance does not make me happy. Having to see her picture all over the place does not make me happy. She just does not make me happy.
2. She is a hypocrite. I could dedicate an entire blog about the hypocrisy of Miley Cyrus and her family but I will keep it short and to the point. In a news article I read in People Magazine (yes, I am obsessed with celebs, and no, I will not apologize for it) her mother was quoted as saying that she still gets grounded for not behaving and she only gets $300.00/month for allowance (pretty respectable considering she will soon be worth $1 billion dollars). I find this laughable as she is photographed riding a bike in Christian Louboutin Fringe Boots that retail for almost $2,000 (I may not be able to afford them, but I can spy Louboutin shoes a mile away). I don't know who came up with the brilliant plan to let some teenager ride around in these boots, but it pisses me off. If she were my daughter, I would have made her donate them to charity if she received them as a gift (or just wear them if they were my size. Just being a little honest here).
3. Her boyfriend should be considered a pedophile. If her parents were normal and like many parents out there, they would not allow there 15 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER dating a nearly 21 YEAR OLD MAN. It absolutely sickens me that nobody has looked into this and that they are so brazen about it. The are photographed everywhere together and and parents have gone on record about approving their "friendship". If my daughter even tries to date somebody nearing 21 years old at that age, he is going to be met with a restraining order at the door.
4. Her "Christian" beliefs. She talks about her Christianity being the foundation of her belief system, yet she poses provocatively, dresses slutty and dates 20 year olds. Nuff said. I would like a side note here as well that she has been photographed with her "friend" going into church. Both are wearing jeans and tank tops. I don't know where they were raised, but that is considered disrespectful in the church from where I come from.
Now, moving on, after my blood pressure has nearly topped the charts, to a person Perez and I differ in opinions. He loves Angelina Jolie. I hate Angelina Jolie. Her holier than thou persona just gets on my nerves. Her "perfect" family and "perfect" life just gets under my skin. I think that she is even a bigger liar than Miley. Here is my problem with her. She has 6 kids, with hopes for more. She is always just in "awe" of how amazing her children are. She travels the world with her children and plan on having more...way more! I would like her to walk in the shoes of a real parent for just one day and see what it is really like to be a mom. First off, there are no nannies. If you are planning an outing, plan on it taking at least 1 hour to actually get out of the house from the time that you begin trying. You will have to deal with dolls being left behind, getting into jackets, getting into the car, buckling everybody up, getting out of the car for the first bathroom break before leaving the driveway, undoing the jacket, cleaning up the accident because the first child did not give you enough notice that they need to get to the bathroom, changing clothes for the child who just wet himself meanwhile listening to the screams of the kids who are still in the car wanting to know what happened to you and needing snack/air/bathroom break. By the time you get out, you would have to put at least 3 if not 4 of your kids in a stroller (which means you would have to BEG somebody to go out with you in order to get out of the house and have them push the other stroller). By the time you get to the destination you have to change diapers, clean up mess in car, get drinks, get snacks and take the ones who are toilet trained to the bathroom. This is all before you go and do whatever it is that you needed to do. See my point. You never see her mentioning anything like that. EVER! Than she talks about how much her kids just LOVE to travel all around the world. I would like her to travel on a regular (non private) plane and see how much they LOVE to travel. I would like to see how she is going to entertain her kids who get antsy after 30 minutes asking how much longer until the get there, kicking the seat in front of them, needing bathroom breaks, having to change diapers while the person you do not know next to you looks on, meanwhile having 2, count them 2, nearly newborns screaming on the top of their lungs because their poor little eardrums are about to rupture and then trying to make bottles for them both. No, Angie, I do not envy your life! I do not care that you get to sleep next to Brad every night (who I am so OVER since he is a big, fat, CHEATER). I think that you are also a big hypocrite making everybody feel like sh*t because of all the "philanthropic" things that you do, yet, live in a $70 million mansion. It's their money. I get it. Spend it the way you want. Just don't make me feel bad because I did not donate to the 3 billion causes that she (or he) is constantly pushing down our throats.
So, in closing, if I ever become famous (I fully believe that this will happen in my lifetime) I only want to meet 2 people. The first is Britney. I have loved her since the beginning and nothing anybody says can make me change my mind. The second is Perez. I think that he is real, he is funny, and there is no way I ever would want to be on his bad side. If you have never checked him out, you must do so today. It is like you are supporting one of my closest friends, err, even though he has no idea who I am :)
www.perezhilton.com
http://m.perezhilton.com for all you mobile phone users.

Anniversary

James and I were able to celebrate our 6 year wedding anniversary yesterday with a babysitter and a quiet dinner out. This was an easy decision after last year's debacle of me spending the entire day doing a home cooked 5 course meal and having a formal dinner with the kids. Though last years dinner was very good (in my opinion at least), the kids whined the entire time through dinner that they did not like it. I had lit some candles to try to set the tone for the evening, but that tone was quickly changed by the kids singing "Happy Birthday to You" (with the cha cha cha's included) at the top of their lungs and continuously blowing out the candles. Obviously, candlelit formal dinners are not typical in the Blackwood household. So this year, James and I got a babysitter, kissed the kids, and tried a new restaurant that is not children friendly. The food was awesome and neither James or myself blew out the candles lit on our table (but I was kind of tempted to do so for some strange reason).
Our anniversary is usually followed by some sort of argument in The Blackwood household, and in all honesty, it is usually me starting the argument (ok, who are we joking, it is me that starts the argument 100% of the time). Our first anniversary I told James that we should not exchange presents so as to watch our money (the time of year is always difficult with the holidays so close, so this is the statement made every year). Right after making that statement, I ran out and bought him something nice (I do not remember what it was, but I am sure that it was nice). When it came time to exchange presents James gave me a beautiful detailed card (kudos for him checking out traditional 1st year presents and finding out that it is paper), and I gave him his present. He thanked me for his present and I burst into tears. James looked at me bewildered wondering why I was crying (I am definitely not the sentimental crying type of person!). Here is how the conversation went:
J: "What is wrong?"
S: "Nothing."
J: "I know that there is something wrong. You are crying."
S. "Nope, Nothing is wrong."
J: "Are you sure? You seem upset."
S: "I am upset. I am upset that you only bought me a card on our first year anniversary." There, I said it.
J: "But you told me that we were not exchanging. I thought that is what you said."
S: "That is what I said, but I meant nothing big, like a diamond ring. I did not mean anything at all."
J: "So why did you not say that?"
S: "Because I meant it and you should know what I meant!"
Note: I do not know why I do this to him. I think there is some female DNA thing that has to set up tests for a significant other in order for them to prove their love. I am not like this all of the time, at least, I don't think that I am.
So year #2 comes and we agree (again) not to exchange anything. This year, I did not buy him a thing since he had not purchased anything for me the year before. I must note that I was pregnant with my second at this time, so I was already a bit emotional. That year, James took me to a 5 star restaurant and gave me a beautiful piece of Tiffany's jewelry. He had also sent 1 dozen long stem roses to me at work and gave me a cotton cleaning cloth for my silver jewelry in honor of the cotton traditional present for the second year anniversary. Again, I burst into tears at the table. James looked incredulously at me and asked "Now what did I do wrong?"
S: "I thought that we agreed to not exchange presents. Now you have given me all these presents and I did not get anything for you".
J: "I do no need anything. I just want you to be happy"
S: "I am HAPPY. I would be HAPPIER if you had stuck to what we said and not given me anything!"
J: "But I did that last year and you were upset because I did not get you anything. What I am supposed to do?"
S: "Oh, just forget it"
**Please note, even I am shocked he has stuck with me this long.
So after 6 wedding anniversaries shared, we now have it nailed down. I got a beautiful pair of earrings that were expensive, but not too expensive that there will be nothing left for Christmas. James got nothing (as he requested). No tears, no arguments, just a good day.
Lastly I have a selfish reason for loving my anniversary so much. The time between November and April is really my favorite time of the year for one specific reason. People do not judge me when asking how long I have been married compared to the age of my daughter. For instance, right now, I would tell people that we have been married for 6 years and that my daughter is 5. This makes me look very respectable. I usually get the comments "Wow, you guys did not waste any time at all" in which I reply "Oh, you have no idea". They seem to figure it out a short time later when they ask when my oldest is turning a year older. Oh well. I had a few moments of no judgment. A wise woman once told me that the first pregnancies are always the shortest. How true it is.
So I will end on this note, I love my husband. I love everything about him. I love that he is successful and compassionate. I love that he loves me and all my faults. I love that he believes in me and that not a day goes by that he does not tell me that I am beautiful. I love that he will come home from working a 12 hour day and make dinner because I can't handle touching raw chicken. I love that he is an excellent father and a good person. I love that he kills spiders, deals with snakes, cleans the gutters, puts out the garbage and does all the gross stuff that is needed around the house. All in all, I fall in love with him more and more each day and feel honored that he chose me as his wife (even if he is not a mind reader!).